For instance, growing up, I refused to let anyone sit on my bed. Not because it was "mine" or I didn't want someone to screw up my very ugly 80's and early 90's comforter (think teals), but because I couldn't handle the thought of a person's smell to be on the bed I slept in. Like an invasion into my safe haven of only me and my germs. Uh. I still can't handle it unless it's someone I'm attracted to. This has also translated into the refusal to use any blanket that I don't know the origins of. Imagine all the germs and smells on those!
Then there is food. Became a vegetarian at age twelve when I started to think literally about food. I mean how can you eat something when it's probably exactly what your thigh would like like baked in an oven? Gross to the millionth degree. I think it's actually a disorder, as I've had to consciously force myself to not think about food literally (like man-made items being essentially sponges injected with chemical flavor on a conveyor belt with depressed people in hairnets) so I don't become a real outcast unable to eat anything. I just don't go there anymore and repress the urge to visualize.
We all have our weird germ issues and phobias. But without getting into it, I know I'm not always conventional in thought. Half the time I have to preface statements with, "I clearly know this is not normal behavior or thought."
Yet a couple weeks ago, when I found myself in that very situation, offering my disclaimer to my uncle, he responded with "I don't think you're weird- you're just innovative."
And I'm taking it and running with it. I'm not strange- I'm innovative!
1 comment:
um. no. you ARE strange.
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