The Issue of Getting Old is All About Prevention

The other night I was with some friends watching a band who happened to attract an older crowd. While our little group ranged from mid-thirties to mid-twenties, surrounding us were the 45+ crowd. I honestly didn't make much of it, besides the shock of seeing a real eighties perm. And not just a perm, but the poodle kind that looked like a helmet. There we were, millenials drinking with the baby boomers. While the baby boomers danced and checked their pagers on their belts (I swear I saw a pager), we had a photo shoot rivaling senior year prom. You really need to keep up on your Facebook pictures apparently. 

As we semi danced to a Janis Joplin cover song (whether fifty or twenty, Janis bridges all generational gaps) my friend gazed absentmindedly over the crowd and muttered, "God, I don't ever want to be old." The fear, the disgust in her revelation was frightening. Because, as my mother always said, "it's better than the alternative". 

I turned to her pointedly and said, "You are old." Whoa, she didn't like that.

"Then I'm going to go out like James Dean," she replied. Those were fightn' words.

"You're already too old." I pointed out.

In a huff the subject was dropped. Okay, yes, looking around at the crowd I can see why one might be fearful of being old. I don't want to be the older woman in a bar and stuck with the same high school hairstyle I've been sporting for thirty years that I don't seem to notice is not like anything besides old photographs. If no celebrity (be it athlete, actress, whatever) has something resembling your hairstyle- it's probably time to update. But knowing is half the battle! It's preventative oldness- taking the correct measures to be sure you can age with dignity and class. And then once you get through those 40's-50's-60's, you're golden. Once you're really up there nobody gives a sh*t about what you do, and you shouldn't either.

On that subject, maybe I should start wearing some eye cream...