Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Five Reasons A Guy Hasn't Called from the Experts at MSN

Whenever I need a good laugh I read the MSN Lifestyle dating and relationship section. They give jaw droppingly stagnant advice, such as smile and touch your face when you talk to let a man know you're interested. Snooze. If you want a man to know you're interested, I suggest flashing him. Straight to the point and rather unconfusing

Today I cyber-stumbled upon "Five Reason's A Guy Hasn't Called"- and I couldn't wait to find out what that annoying spiky haired spaz author of "He's Just Not That Into You" hasn't already revealed in the mysterious world of over analyzing a man's simple actions. I've taken the liberty of providing you with the genius insight, as well as my equally unwarranted professional advice on the reality of the situation.

MSN: He doesn't want to seem desperate
ME: You aren't that remarkable that he can't stop thinking about you. He'll call you when you cross his mind.

MSN: He's busy.
ME: He's fielding text messages from several possibilities, do you think you're the only girl out there? Give me a break. When a window opens, or he's bored, he'll call.

MSN: He's seen Swingers one too many times- which suggests waiting for a few days to call
ME: His friends told him there is a hotter girl going to the party tomorrow, so he better wait and see what she has to offer first.

MSN:He wants to slow things down
ME: He wants to slow things down, unless you mean after bar hours of course.

MSN: He's just not that into you
ME: If you had to go through 4 scenarios to conclude he isn't into you, you've wasted way too much time thinking about this. Go get a martini and chill.

1 comment:

Jameil said...

lol i had stopped reading msn's relationship advice for precisely that reason-- there was nothing revelatory but i now see i can look on it in a new light: cynicism. yay!!